Saturday, June 14, 2008

Stale Popcorn: Wicker Man

It's an old one, but worth revisiting. Jim Slotek of the Toronto Sun wrote the following (one star):

It really is a shame that Nicolas Cage is becoming synonymous with bad movies. He asserts his talent on occasion. But too often his "performance" is just a bunch of phoned-in self-parodying mannerisms.

In the case of The Wicker Man, a moronic and muddled Hollywood remake of one of the best British thrillers ever, Cage seems to be acting in a whole other movie -- with, as they say in the TV capsules, hilarious results.

Hilarious? Wait until you see him taking part in a pagan ritual, dressed as a bear. . .

Hey, but don't worry. Our hero Nic gets to punch some of these bad women in the face before we're done. As they say on South Park "dude, this is pretty f---ed up right here." . . .

And where the original gave up details a bit at a time, LaBute's script is so expository it insults the stupid. Characters pick up books and read aloud extensively about Druid traditions and sacrifice rituals. Burstyn and her right-hand pagan Sister Rose (Molly Parker) practically admit in the first act that they perform human sacrifices. It's LaBute's first thriller, and it's so hamhanded you want to douse it in mustard. . .

BOTTOM LINE: A great thriller has been remade into one of the most laughable. Nicolas Cage seems to be acting in another movie, waving his arms around, shouting, pulling guns and even punching smiling pagan women. And Neil LaBute -- who never met a story he couldn't turn into a paranoid castration fantasy -- dumbs things down enough to insult the stupid.

Read the full review here.

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